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Hi, This is Wayne. This is my site, my stuff, my blog, blahblahblah. The site itself is powered by WordPress and the Scary Little theme. I thought it was cool, and I still do.

Recently, the following events transpired in this order

  1. When I tried to use my debit card laaaate Friday night (Saturday morning) at a restaurant, the guy said it was declined.
  2. I asked them to try again.   He did, and it was declined again.  The guy said it’s been happening to a lot of people that night and it might be a glitch. I finished my transaction with another payment method.
  3. I thoroughly enjoyed my food.  Like, a lot.
  4. Next day I called my Credit Union to inquire about this issue, and they said the account looked fine and it was probably a glitch.  I noted with satisfaction that I had remembered the restaurant guy using the same technical jargon.
  5. Later that day I tried using my debit card online and it was denied again.  I’m pretty sure I sighed loudly and with emphasis.
  6. Called the Credit Union back and said it happened again.  They said that my card had been called in “stolen”.
  7. I was like, “dude.  wait, what?
  8. They said someone called in and reported my card stolen. I let them know I did no such thing, but it’s probably better if it stays that way and I work on getting a new one.  They said they’d transfer me to the fraud department to discuss further.
  9. I was transferred to a department that was not open on the weekend. HEY!
  10. So I called back and they said “oops”.  They followed up the “oops” with “sorry, I transferred you to the business hours number; let me transfer you to the after-hours number”.  I liked how they used the semi-colon in their statement so I could identify it for later blogging.
  11. I was transferred to a department that only accepts voicemails on the weekend. HEY!
  12. Left a voicemail; got no response.
  13. Got a call on my cell phone from a number in Miami, FL in (786) area code.  It was an automated system that said “Hello.  This is blahblahblah credit union (not mine).  We understand you’ve received your new credit card.  Would you like to activate it now? Press 1 if so”.
  14. I pressed 1, but was already suspicious.
  15. Sure enough, the automatron asked me to enter in my new 16 digit credit card number.
  16. I hung up with aplomb.
  17. Waited until Monday, called in to the Credit Union and we had a good chat about the experience.  They offered to take the block off the card if I still needed it, but I, in my infinite wisdom and a display of extreme mental dexterity deserving of an Oscar, decided to keep it blocked and just get a new one.
  18. They said I didn’t even have to wait the 7-10 business days to get a replacement, because now my Credit Union has the ability to print up new cards right inside the branch!  I’d only have to wait a few minutes and I could be off to the races.
  19. NOTE: the above race-based comment is not meant to offend anyone of any race, creed, color or national origin.  It is, however, meant to offend people of equine descent.
  20. I went in Tuesday morning to take care of this presto-chango gimme-a-new-card-in-minutes service.
  21. NOT
  22. Turns out the extra “discount package passport modifier” aka Password Unlimited feature I have on my debit card restricts replacements to mail only.  So there will be no presto-chango for me on my card.
  23. The Credit Union keeps the card to shred and I’ll just do without for a couple weeks while I wait for the replacement to come by mail.
  24. I get to work, EXCITED about the Jon Anderson concert for Tuesday night.  I’m like, super jazzed about seeing him in concert.
  25. I check my email for my ticket information, because I couldn’t remember if I had bought a ticket by email that required printing, or if it was Will Call.
  26. It was Will Call.
  27. (foreshadowing should have kicked into gear by now).
  28. I look at the terms for Will Call.  They state that you must have a photo ID that matches the name and address on the order, as well as the credit card used to place the order.
  29. Ouch.
  30. So I call the ticket place to check on this, given that I had to surrender my card due to fraud.  They said “no problem, you can just bring in a statement or something that lists the card number and your name.”
  31. I was like, “FAIL“.
  32. Argh.  I realized the problem now was — this is a debit card, aka “check card”.  It’s not a real credit card.  I don’t get a statement that lists the credit card number.  I only get a statement that lists my member number.
  33. I call back the Credit Union and ask what official documents they offer that would satisfy the ticket place’s demand for my credit card number.  They say nothing has that.
  34. However, I talked with the same lady to took my credit card to shred and let me know she hadn’t shred it yet and if I’d like to come back and get it, I can.
  35. I was like, “EPIC WIN“.
  36. I retrieved the card during lunch and had a tasty low carb meal from Jack in the Box.  While the culinary detail may not be important to the story, the non sequitur rules dictate the price of tea in china.
  37. I went to the Paramount Theatre for my concert, ready to get my ticket.
  38. When I got to the window, the teller asked “Last Name?”
  39. I said “Hall”
  40. She gave me the ticket.
  41. No ID.  No credit card.  No paperwork.  No signature.
  42. No kidding.
  43. Ok, enough of the backstory.
  44. The YES fans milling about in front of the Paramount before the doors opened were easy to engage with in conversation.  I even re-met one of the guys I talked with during the Dallas YES show last year.
  45. What a show!  THANK YOU JON ANDERSON FOR A WONDERFUL PERFORMANCE.  In case you were wondering, I was the one who shouted “… we just love you a little bit more!” when talking about how great Austin is compared to the other cities he plays. (it’s a lyric reference to his “Everybody Loves You” solo track).
  46. An excerpt of his final song is included below for your watching and listening enjoyment.

I’m a little surprised at how small the video is — it makes it look like I was way in the back.  This was taken with my iPhone, and I’m pleasantly surprised at the quality of the sound.  The acoustics of the Paramount are stellar and I’m glad some of that came across with this video.  Maybe there’s a way to zoom in on the video (let me know if you have suggestions) and repost.

If you get a chance to see Jon Anderson in concert, grab the opportunity.  There are only a few more spots on this tour left, and then supposedly he’s touring with Rick Wakeman in Europe.  Check out more info at his website.

And lo, the people did comment thus:

7 Comments

  1. Ren says:

    I can fix your card issue if you send me your checking account number and routing number. For expedited service, please include your SS# and your mother’s maiden name.

  2. Poppy says:

    I thoroughly enjoyed this read-by-numbers post.

    I almost got shoved into collections because I have a credit card company that just randomly will decide my account activity looks suspicious and cancels the card that is linked to several recurring payment services. :-/

  3. Sybil Law says:

    Banks and debit card make for good reading, though!
    So glad you had fun at the concert – did you flash him?

  4. martymankins says:

    Ren’s failure to ask for your ATM pin number means he cannot commit any fraud against you.

    Speaking of fraud, sounds like your credit union needs a better solution for handling both real and faux fraud issues with their debit card management.

    And excited that you enjoyed the Jon Anderson show.

    And finally, I have removed the option to show my last blog post here to respect your PG rated comment terms of conditions (visit my blog and you’ll see why)

  5. Avitable says:

    Gotta give you credit. Funny story.

  6. sue says:

    Ugh. Scary stuff… Glad it turned out okay for you!

  7. Barbara Slavin says:

    I love the line: “I hung up with aplomb”.

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