I love starting a new series on my blog.  It’s something new, fresh, sure to please the censors and cures acne.  Sometimes I forget about the new series I’ve created, but that’s in the future and why worry about something so far off?  I don’t like to worry.

Today I want to tell you about my favorite drink holder.  It’s been with me ten years or more, and I don’t know why I love it.  I just do.  My brother has one, my dad has one, and I has one.

You may recognize this as a Treasure Island mug from Las Vegas.  That’s what it is.

Just look at it.  It’s mesmerizing in its coolness.  It sits there, nonchalantly holding whatever beverage that happens to be inside it, but all the while, it’s plotting its next move.  It’s scanning the environment, memorizing license plates, prioritizing attack targets and calculating emergency failback scenarios.  It will wreak havoc when you least suspect it because… well, it’s a skull.  Skulls do that.

Not only is it handy having a hell-bent agent of destruction and evil sitting next to me, it holds quite a volume of tasty beverage!  I don’t have to be bothered with constant refill trips to the water cooler - I only have to refill it 3 or 4 times a day.  If it were a lesser skull mug or (GASP) a non-skull mug, like a Hello Kitty mug or a “World’s #1 Boss” mug, I just would probably die of thirst because of how often I’d be required to fill it.  No sir, this is one BIG mug.

I should point out that there are certain people who cannot stand this mug.  I won’t name names, but in particular this person can be described as “someone who happens to be married to me.”  I have found out that all the Hall wives despise our skull mugs.  The way I ”found out” was the mug was found in the garbage one day.   I saved it (I have no choice, it controlls controls my actions) and it was thrown out again shortly thereafter.  Turns out my brother faced the same bizarre circumstances and it was later we found out that there was a conspiracy to eradicate the skulls from our collective possession.

I can only attribute this action by the Hall wives to uncontrolled envy.  Or madness.  I like envy because it conveys a certain respect upon the person I’m accusing of envy, as it assumes that they like (love) the same thing I do - enough to take it away.  But madness will do in a pinch.  Either way, I now keep the skull at work on my desk.  Heaven help the poor unsuspecting user who comes my way looking for help.

Well, I need to go.  I’ve got absolutely nothing to do today and I wanna get started.