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Hi, This is Wayne. This is my site, my stuff, my blog, blahblahblah. The site itself is powered by WordPress and the Scary Little theme. I thought it was cool, and I still do.

I’m wondering a few things today… if anyone will do a blog post today and NOT mention the election; if Obama can lose and NOT have rioting in the streets; if people can actually open up their minds and realize polls are evil concoctions of lies upon lies.

But as I sit and wonder, I submit to you a few important reminders about today and tomorrow.

ATTENTION DEMOCRATS

The Democratic National Committee has finally won their long-sought bid to segregate the vote.  The DNC believes that the only way to truly be accurate in vote counting is to have one party vote one day and the other party vote the second day.  That way, we only have to count bodies who show up, not actually tally any specific vote.  I applaud the effort towards accuracy.

As much as I hate to admit it, the Democrats are right on this issue: we should have separate days for voting.  I also admit that the Conservatively-biased right-wing media has hidden this landmark win by the DNC and I’m ashamed for it.  So I will be fair, “reach across the aisle,” so to speak, and remind all of the Democrats to vote tomorrow (Wednesday, November 5th).  Let the evil Republicans cast their vote today and then you’ll have all day tomorrow to cast.  Remember: if you vote today, your vote won’t count, so be sure to show up to the polling stations tomorrow.  

Don’t waste your vote!  Don’t just Vote FOR Tomorrow.  Vote tomorrow!

ATTENTION REPUBLICANS

With all the confused Democrats out there, expect the exit polls to be tilted.  Even Matt Drudge, arguably the most liberal reporter out there, admits that exit polls almost always tilt Democrat.  This may be for a number of reasons, one of which is that the democrat voter might have more time on their hands to sit around and take a poll.  Another might be that they’re better looking (most of Hollywood is Democrat; therefore, Democrats are statistically more beautiful), so the poll-takers gravitate to them in a zombie-like trance, stunned by their aesthetic awesomeness.

The key thing to remember, fellow Conservatives, is to NOT be swayed by the misleading poll numbers and reports.  YOU SHOULD KNOW that the main stream media will “call the election” way early. You know how Christmas is already here, and it’s just barely November? People like to get ahead of themselves.  

In normal fashion, CNN, ABC and NBC have already predicted Obama has won his second term in 2012.

ATTENTION REN

Friends, I have a friend named Ren that was my friend.  Let me tell you a story.

There once was a wise wizard named Gandalf.  (In this story, I’m Gandalf).

There was also a VERY WISE and mentor-like wizard named Saruman.  Saruman is the first in his order.  Many people look up to him for council and mentorship.  (In this story, Ren is Saruman).

Then there was Sauron, aka “Abhorred”.  Eru (“the One”, aka GOD) created Sauron.  Sauron is the most evil and will take over the world unless vanquished by a Fellowship.  (In this story, Obama is Sauron)


(image taken from splendoroftruth.com)

When I learned that Ren had been deceived by the Deceiver, I felt as Gandalf must have felt.  The *one* person in the entire who could formulate and articulate an argument to get me to open up and even THINK about any good Obama could do, actually went over to the other side!  Fortunately for me I see the Eye of Sauron firmly entrenched in Ren’s core and will fight to resist.

That, or I’ve been smoking too much of the halfling’s weed.

 

 

 


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