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Hi, This is Wayne. This is my site, my stuff, my blog, blahblahblah. The site itself is powered by WordPress and the Scary Little theme. I thought it was cool, and I still do.

The results came in on the Hot Blogger Calendar contest, and out of 34,234 entrants (which is about as high of a number as 128 to Rain Man), they chose the top twelve (12) vote-getters. I was #17 on the list. Oh way to go, contest-runners. Like you had to follow the rules this time?!?!?!?!

I’m thinking we should petition them to make an 18-month calendar. I mean, who uses 12-month calendars nowadays anyway, huh? Don’t you need a calendar that spans into half of the following year? Send your comments to the folks (Jane and Sarah) and demand the public’s right to an 18-month calendar! Go over to the results blog post and add a comment that says you want an 18-month calendar!

In the event they do not choose to make an 18-month calendar and include the great and powerful whall in their product, I have no choice but to take action. I will now attempt to disqualify enough people ahead of me so that I place in the top 12.

Here are the top vote-getters, aka “the final results“:

Let me just be a little contradictory here and say, those aren’t so final, haHA!  Here’s how I figure it:

“Winner” Votes Reason Expert Analysis
The Comics Curmudgeon 735 Cheating This guy is clearly a cheater. Even his initials, TCC, is too close to resembling “The Constant Cheater” for anyone to take a chance at thinking he’s honest. His name anagrams into not only “Eccentric Good Hummus” but also “Comedic Shogun Rectum” and what good ever came from either of those? NOTHING, I tell you.
Avitable 429 Sold soul to Devil Interesting fact: when Avitable sold his soul to Satan, it was the first time Satan was ever heard to say “I think I just threw up in my mouth a little.”
Geri Druckman 366 Has Girly Name Quick! Think of all the men who have the name “Geri” spelled that way. Yeah, I thought so. Compare that to “Wayne”. Say it aloud. “W-A-Y-N-E”. Yeah, that’s how it is. Uh-HUH.
Ghost of Keywork 212 Is a Ghost Sorry, the fine print of the contest rules clearly states “if you are a ghost and you win, you do not win, you lose because you are a ghost. We don’t expect you to understand it, because, well, you’re a ghost. And a loser. And you especially don’t win if you beat whall in the voting.”
Wil Wheaton (aka Wesley Crusher) 172 Just cuz Look, you don’t get to be in Star Trek as a kid AND win contests. Ever. You already won. YOU WERE IN STAR TREK. YOU DON’T GET ANYTHING ELSE. YOU WON.


Yes – I got beat by Wesley Crusher.

So now that I’ve successfully disqualified enough people, that should put me squarely in the top 12.


Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou, [pause] thankyou, [bow], no, thankyou. Thanx. Thank you.

tsk tsk

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